Fellow friend, for the past few months, you kept hearing about my turning 30. While I may have been a tad over-dramatic about this change of age, the anticipation has been peppered with shifts of consciousness and upgrades to the ways in which I perceive myself, as a sentient being, as a human and as a woman. Today, I am 3 days short of being 30 and I am fortunate enough to have a December birthday, which means that I can take this opportunity to draw a line on my lessons and achievements for this year as well as for this decade of my life.
In Romania, we call these milestones related to round-number ages “changing the prefix”, and just like a prefix changes the meaning of the word it is placed before, so does moving into another phase of our existences. New responsibilities, new possibilities, new opportunities lay ahead, and in order to be able to grasp them integrally, one must be in full mastery of the tools and skills they already possess.
While I have never been an adept of the one-size-fits-all attitude to directing one’s life choices, nor one to bother myself with the burden of complying with societal pressures, I must confess that turning 30 has made me put myself under torturous interrogation, with questions such as: “When are you getting married?”, “When are you having children?” and the likes.
Furthermore, I have undergone some interesting challenges concerning my relationship with men and with my body and I have come to realise that I wrongly perceived the two as practically overlapping, which has, in turn, generated far too lengthy turmoil and self-doubt, as I needed the validation of a romantic partner in order to feel beautiful and worthy of love.
Without further ado, allow me, fellow friend, to share my recent learnings about myself, the 10 commandments that I vow to commit to and wholeheartedly follow, in the eve of what is probably the most important change of age since I identify as a conscious and conscientious individual:
1. I am a believer in the Good in people, and while “one runs the risk of crying a bit if one allows oneself to be tamed”; I must always nurture connection and never stop allowing people or experiences (be they gifts or lessons) from reaching me.
2. I am just as stupidly and hopelessly romantic as I was 10 or 15 years ago, yet I must always stay grounded in my power, in self-respect and in living by my own rules and standards.
3.I am still struggling with body positivity, but I have learned that I must always be the storyteller and be in charge of the narrative of how my body is perceived and treated, be it by myself or by the people who are granted access to it.
4. I trust that Love is the answer to every question we have about who we are, where we come from, why we are here and where we’re headed next and I must always be, think, speak and act from a place of unconditional Love.
4b. I am here to contribute to the abundance, the flow and the love that my family, my friends, my community, my world and myself accept and experience, and therefore, I must always act with love, kindness, patience, compassion and forgiveness.
5. I must always listen to my intuition and follow the advice of my Higher Self and my Spiritual Guides, because they are there to protect me and to help me progress on the path to fulfilling my life purpose.
6. I must always forgive and understand myself and those around me, for all the hurtful, chaotic and low-vibe words, decisions and actions we take when we allow our egos to manifest their fear, insecurity, anger, violence and unawareness, and I must always keep the faith that healing and redemption will follow.
7. I am and I must always be a thoughtful, cautious, truthful, honest and responsible person and in no way should I consider that a flaw or hindrance to my capacity of enjoying life and be happy and spontaneous, on the contrary, an enabler to doing things in safety and comfort.
8. I must absolutely stop doubting, belittling or neglecting my primordial needs and personal laws of conduct, in an attempt to be a people-pleaser and to prioritise and accommodate other people’s opinions, beliefs or selfish desires.
9. I must always stand up for, speak my mind and be a defender of justice and equality, even when I am afraid of the consequences, because I am a messenger of Truth, Light and Love, and while I respect, protect and promote these Universal gifts, I will be protected and rewarded.
10. I must always proudly and worthily carry and represent myself, my family, my ancestors and my heritage, in order to contribute to the diversity, the richness and the beauty of humankind, so that we may all learn from one another and help each other grow and reach our utmost potential.
A few years back, my mother and I watched a remarkable movie, The Physician, and one quote has lingered with me: “May the Lord have mercy upon me. Bless me in my long and dangerous journey. Let not the waves engulf me, nor sea monsters devour me. Let not bandits slit my throat, or wolves eat me alive. Let me not starve or get lost in the dark woods or cold mountains. And please let Jesus forgive me that I shall deny my faith and soil myself with sin, to serve your creation and glory”.
As I set sails and embark on my own journey of being a full-fledged adult and a well-rounded (pun intended) woman, I bow in awe and gratitude and I thank the Universe for all of the people, gifts, travels and experiences; for the laughter, the cry, the joy and the sadness that it has thus far facilitated me to encounter.
I pray and I humbly ask for permission to make best use of all that I know, that I have and that I am. May I be of benefit to humanity and to myself, may I be a worthy channel of the wonders and the magic residing within the Universal Soul. May I be the living proof that peace and harmony exist, may I be an Ambassador of Heaven on Earth. May I be a loving daughter, sister, friend, mother and wife, and may I be Love.
Love,
Vladiana
Love Labourer 